Life in Clothing

As some of you may know, I use to be an avid MySpacer. Writing blogs on MySpace was a big draw for me. I was thinking recently (I know this because I don't think very often) and I was reminded of a blog that I wrote a couple of years ago about clothes. This blog kind of fell by the wayside, but it was one of my most favorite blogs that I had written. I'm not patting myself on the back or anything, it just held a lot of truth for me and it was a very important subject to me at that time in my life. It's strange how things of importance at one point seem to find their way back around to becoming important again. Anyways, please enjoy "Life in Clothing."


Clothes are a funny thing. The thing is that we all need clothes, so the search for the perfect attire is something that we all will eventually have to deal with. We might stand in front of clothing racks for hours to select one article of clothing. Why do we put so much thought and effort into these choices? It's because we're scared. We're scared of the consequences that might occur once we make our purchase. We're scared that it might not fit us. We're scared that it might not match anything else that we have. We're scared of what other people might think about it. We're scared that we might get it home, and find out about a fault that wasn't visible in the store. We're scared that we might wear it once, then forget about it. As unbelievable as it sounds, we're scared that we might have broken the hearts of the other clothes in the store that we glanced at, but passed over and left them sitting on the shelf. Sometimes, we believe that we don't even need something new, and we go on with what we already have. We're content with the wardrobe with which we have surrounded ourselves. All of these factors play a role in our selection process. Most of the time, we come home with an item that we will soon regret ever wasting money on. We begin to think that we should have taken a chance on the dress shirt, or the boot-cut jeans. So the question arises, why do we continue our search for the perfect clothing? The answer is simple. Eventually, we find it. Many times, it isn't obviously noticeable. We all have that faded t-shirt or those comfy shoes that make up our favorite attire, but we had no idea it would become that perfect piece when we bought it. We may not realize it until we've worn it several times, washed it and re-washed it, and gotten use to it. It becomes comfortable. It becomes a part of us. We become so happy that we made the decision that we made. We grow so attached to it, that it doesn't even matter what others may say or think about it. It doesn't matter if it becomes worn down, old and tattered. It's our safety blanket. It compliments us. We grow to love it. We think to ourselves, wouldn't it have been a shame if I passed this over? If I didn't take it when I had the chance? Of course, we would never know what we were missing out on. But the risk was worth the reward. Why is it so hard for us to take that risk? Why do we become content with our surroundings? Why do we give up the search for the perfect piece of clothing? Why is the pain of regret so frightening and so difficult that we can't look beyond it to see possible bliss and infinite happiness is waiting for us? Clothes......funny things.

My Most Underrated Movies

So this past week on facebook I gave a list of some of my most underrated movies of all time (and when I say all time, I mean movies of my generation, for the most part over the past 2o years with a couple of exceptions). I didn't necessarily list anything in order of importance, except for Fight Club, which is my number 1. Everything behind it is in no particular order, and it's what I started this list off with as well. Since I only had seven days, there were many movies that got left off my list. Here is my complete list. Remember, my definition of "underrated" is that the movies don't get the full credit they deserve. Some of these movies may be well-recognized, I just don't feel as if they are recognized to their full potential. Feel free to add to it, criticize, compliment, or completely desecrate. That's what it's here for, to cause discussion.

• Fight Club - Brad Pitt's best ever. Ed Norton solidified as a leading man. A movie ending that, if watched now for the first time, could be seen coming a mile away, but only because it has been so often imitated. In it's day, ground-breaking.
• Groundhog Day - The perfect comedy. Bill Murray in his prime paired with an original story line. "It's gonna be cold, it's gonna be gray, and it's gonna last for the rest of your life."
• The Fast and The Furious - Forget about the acting. It made car movies cool again, simple as that. Trust me, I was there on opening night to see posers rollin' up to the AMC in their imports with blades and lights underneath. It was big time.
• The Cable Guy - This should be the blueprint of how a dark comedy is made. Jim Carrey gives one of his less annoying performances, but he creates a character that you hate and feel sorry for. "Gotta warm up, don't wanna pull a hammy."
• Gone in 60 Seconds - Cool concept and great cars. "Good brakes. Good brakes, too."
• The Prestige - 2 hours of Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman one-upping each other. Throw in Scarlet Johansenn and you have yourself a winner.
• Tin Cup - Look, I realize Kevin Costner is a beating, but if he was born to play any role, it was that of Roy MacAvoy. This is one of the few golf movies that you can stay awake through.
• Minority Report - I am catching a lot of flack over this one, but stay with me. Tom Cruise pre-"couch-jumping", Steven Spielberg at the helm, running in a futuristic world where crime doesn't exist, or can someone still beat the system. Great ending.
• The Sandlot - I just feel as if this is one of the greatest movies ever so it may never get the full credit it's due. That's it.
• Any Given Sunday - Oliver Stone does a good job of putting you in the action on the field, and who can play the aging egocentric coach better than Pacino. "My name is Willie, Willie Beaman."
• Boondock Saints - Surely you knew this movie would pop up, right?
• Donnie Darko - Not necessarily something you wanna watch for laughs, but is so much fun trying to wrap your mind around such a crazy story. Jake G is perfectly crazy.
• Hook - This movie is still fun to watch even when you're older. Dustin Hoffman made the movie. "Rufio, Rufio, R-FI-OOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
• Man On Fire - It's always cool to watch Denzel play a Bad-A.
• O Brother, Where Art Thou? - Clooney's best? Possibly. The music is legendary and quotes come a mile a minute. "Dammit, I wasn't hit by no train!"
• Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure - Say what you want about it, but it kick-started Keanu's career. And even though it's been an awful career, there have been some entertaining movies.
• Red Eye - I have a man-crush on Cillian Murphy and a straight crush on Rachel McAdams, so this works well for me. It's claustrophobically tense.
• Four Brothers - This is a man's movie right here. Shooting, fighting, cussing, Mark Wahlberg! Whoooo!!!
• Smokin' Aces - This movie very much fits the bill of underrated. Jeremy Piven should have had an Oscar nom, plus it was one of our first exposures to the new Captian Kirk. There are 4 Ryan Reynolds movies on my list, including this one, because normally if he's in it, it's underrated, which leads me to...
• Van Wilder - This was our first real taste of Reynolds. How can you not like him?
• Gangs of New York - Ya really just can't go wrong with Leo and Scorsese. Plus, Daniel Day-Lewis makes The Butcher possibly the most underrated villain of all time.
• Three Amigos - Three comedians in their prime. Best. Comedy. Ever. "I think it's a mail plane..."
• Maverick - This movie is just flat-out entertaining. It's a comedy, action, western, and drama rolled into one with some brilliant poker scenes, including Brett's last hand with the the no-look card toss.
• Space Jam - Of course I'm going to put it on this list, it had MJ.
• Rounders - Barely edges Maverick out of the top poker spot. John Malkovich is such a great actor and this is one of his greatest roles. "He beat me, straight up."
• Swingers - It has to go on the list because it introduced us to the Vince Vaughn we know and love. "You're so money and you don't even know it."
• Two For The Money - I don't know why I put this here. I just like this movie.
• Memento - Be prepared to take Tylenol afterwards because it will have your brain working from beginning to end. Very cool concept, plus it supported my crush on Carrie Ann Moss.
• Boiler Room - Ya know, I just love Giovanni Ribisi, and Ben Affleck doesn't completely suck in this one.
• Just Friends - Refer to my facebook page and you'll find out how much I love this movie. It actually gets funnier the more you watch it. How is that possible?
• Waiting - My final Ryan Reynolds film on the list. Gives you a whole new perspective on being a jerk to your waiter. It's also Dane Cook's only funny movie, so enjoy it while it lasts. "She's got that Scooby-Doo tongue."
• Hellboy - This movie has a pretty big cult following, so don't hate on me for this one. It's actually really well done and not as cheesy as you think.
• Alpha Dog - I included this movie because it is jam packed with young talent. Justin Timberlake in his first major movie does a terrific job, Emile Hirsch proves he can carry a movie if he's called on, and my absolute favorite young actor, Ben Foster, has perfected the art of the quietly intense angry young man.
• Snatch - Guy Ritchie's best movie with all of the elements that he's known for. He sprawls the movie out into a hundred different directions, and pulls it all together in the end. And Brad Pitt is a gypsy bare-knuckle boxer. So legit.
• Equilibrium - It wasn't as ground-breaking as The Matrix, but it was smarter, and it's the only movie you can see Christian Bale sword fight Taye Diggs. Yeah, you read that right.

Thoughts???

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year???

For those who know me, I'm not a big holiday fan. Mainly, I can't stand Valentine's Day and Christmas. Now look, I'm not trying to get into any debates with anybody here, I just don't like it. If you like Christmas, that's fine. You're stupid, but that's fine. So back in the day I wrote a blog about my feelings towards Christmas, and I thought I would revive it. Here it is, the old "Merry Christmas, Suckers" blog with a few updates I threw in. Enjoy, and I hope you all get lumps of coal.

I hate Christmas. Have I ever told you that? Hate it. "Why Kaleb, why on God's glorious green and red earth would you hate such a magical holiday filled with love and good cheer?" If you asked that question, I hate you, too. People like you make me throw up all over myself. Well, not really throw up all over myself, but more so just kind of in my mouth. You know the kind, when you swallow it back down, then pop in some Orbit gum so you don't have puke-breath. Now don't get me wrong, there are parts of Christmas that I like. I like the music for about two weeks or so, and I like going home and spending time with my family. Well, at least my immediate family. Everything else is simply sickening. I hate the build-up of Christmas that starts after Halloween. I hate the let down after the presents are opened in 3 minutes time. I hate the fake jollyness that people lay on really thick just because "it's that special time of year." I hate the bell-ringers who stare at me the whole time I'm walking into Wal-Mart and then make me feel guilty when I don't give them anything by saying, "God bless you, sir." I hate when I walk by these bell-ringers that I have to pat my pockets and shrug my shoulders at them to let them know I don't have anything (I really do this), then pretend like I'm on my cell phone when I'm walking out. I hate shopping, and I hate malls, and I hate the crowds. I hate the Zales commercials where one guy is walking out of the store and slaps high fives with the guy walking into the store while that ridiculous Vanessa Carlton song plays in the background. I hate the new commercial with the guy and his girlfriend at the cabin in the storm and he gives that creepy line, "I'm right here.... And I always will be." I hate the confusion of decorating a tree when it's 72 degrees outside. I hate watching the little couples walk around with their stupid mittens and matching toboggans and kissing under mistletoe, which is a poisonous plant for a reason! I hate the endless, worthless, crappy movies that TBS and ABC Family play all the time like Home Alone 3, Jingle All The Way, Santa Baby Christmas Maybe, Christmas Shoes, The Dog that Saved Christmas, Jack Frost, even Elf, and I hate how Rob Lowe seems to find his way into most of these movies. I hate Christmas parties and giving White Elephant gifts. We get it, your gift was a gift someone gave you last year, or it was inappropriate, or it was, oh my gosh this is so funny, an actual ceramic white elephant! I hate Christmas cards and receiving family Christmas cards and taking photos for family Christmas cards (sorry Mom). And if I see a freakin' reindeer anytime soon, I'm gonna put a hole in it's head, mount it on my wall, and show my niece and nephew on Christmas morning. So that's it! Merry Christmas, you suckers, and Bah Humbug!!!

Tiger-Tiger-Tiger Woods, Y'all!

Here's the thing. I use to keep a blog. My first blog was Xanga, raise your hand if you remember that site. Then, I got wise and moved over to MySpace. Then came Facebook, and I just completely gave up writing blogs because I figured people were more interested in keeping up with old friends than going to MySpace just to read what I wrote. Back in the day, I was pretty good at writing these things, and I missed it too much, so I'm giving it another shot. We'll see if it's worth keeping alive, or putting to an early death.

One of the main reasons I wanted to start this now is because there is one major issue in the sports world that everyone has something to say about. Of course, it's all about my boy, Tiger Woods. You've gotta ask yourself, why all this fuss over Tiger? Why did everyone try so hard to pry into his life after he had a wreck? Why was everyone so quick to jump to conclusions that it was domestic abuse? Why wouldn't anyone accept the fact that he wanted to deal with it privately? Why was no one satisfied that they weren't getting information? Why were some of the girls he had affairs with so ugly? I'm going to let you in on something that was going through my head, and there are probably very many guys who share my opinion. I didn't want to know a thing.

Yes, it's a provocative story involving the most popular athlete in the world, but I wanted so badly for the media to drop it and leave it alone forever. Why? Because I want to be Tiger Woods. Who doesn't? Maybe not now, but the pre-affair Tiger. The guy was dominant in a very difficult sport. He will probably go down as the greatest ever. He's known all over the world. He's endorsed by just about everything. He's the first ever billion dollar athlete. He lives in a mansion in Florida with his two kids and Swedish model wife. Are you feelin' me now? Over the past decade, he has been painted as the perfect portrait of a hero, and I bought into it. He made a sport that I love fun for everyone to watch. He even put out some great video games. People who don't even care for the game would watch when Tiger was playing. He changed the sport from a game played by overweight cigar-smokers to a game played by physically fit weight-lifters. He's a man. He is a man's man. And I wanted so badly for this story to be left alone so that idea didn't change, but it forever has. In some aspect, I was right. He is a man. He is not perfect. In fact, he's extremely stupid. I continually get fooled into believing that athletes are role models made of some other-worldly matter that isn't affected by mere mortals of Earth. I am continually proven wrong. I think that we all want someone to root for. I believe humans are inherently optimistic and want to see their lives played out as if they are extras in movies, rooting on whatever character they choose as their lead. However the movie always takes a turn for the worst when the lead character doesn't reach their climax the way we wanted them to.

What if we're the lead? What if we are the heroes of our movies? We place our hope in false idols and are constantly disappointed. What if we are supposed to be pulling for ourselves? Maybe God put us on this earth to make a difference in other people's lives. Yes, we have a supporting cast. Yes, we have conflict that we must overcome. Yes, because of Christ who will never fail, we will eventually overcome that conflict, hit the climax, and reach a resolution. God has written, produced, and is directing lives that He wants to use to glorify Himself through lives lived to the fullest. Maybe that's Tiger's problem, he's directing himself in his own feature film. Who is your director?